WTF-n-Stuff - 365 Project

Guilty

2012-01-27T01:45:00.000-06:00

ask My Mother

she will attest.

So today My Wife and Cathy Rigby and I had our monthly lunch planned. And last time we met for lunch one or several of us talked about "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo". That book held me hostage several years ago.

So we decided to go see it today. At lunch. On a school day.

This was a very bold move.

My Wife and I walked into the theatre and there was Cathy Rigby - waving her box of Raisinettes at us. I loaded up on buttered popcorn and glanced around the Mega Theatre Plex. "We are just down the hall and to the right, " chirped Cathy. "I already scoped it out."

We settled into our seats and *that* is when I overheard My Wife confirming, "Now, you did read the book, right?"

CR said no.

I said "Any chance you saw the Swedish version of the film."

CR said no again.

Oh dear.

Cuz here is the dealio, folks. Cathy Rigby is Ever So. Ever So nice. Ever So polite. Ever So endearing. Ever So innocent (well.......) and this tale that is about to unfold before her eyes is a bit....raw. And that is giving me a worry.

I whispered to her, "You can shut your eyes during the scary parts."

And yes - she did bolt out of the theatre at one point in search of "water".

And yes - I guess I felt guilty. Not totally because of her experience. She is artistically inclined enough to have really appreciated the story and the acting and the cinematography.

No.....I ended up feeling guilty because here it was at Noon on a School Day and I was at a Movie Theatre!

Holy Crap!

That is like worse than getting my nails done or a haircut or something.

Cathy Rigby hung in there. And when the film was over, I was really hoping for some talk time. But we all looked at our phone clocks and panicked.

"I gotta go get my car at the shop!"

"I gotta go get my kid!"

"I gotta get to rehearsal!"

"Love you! Thanks!" we all shouted.

And we scattered.

I can't wait for next month. Most likely we will go to lunch. But maybe.....just maybe....we will do something daring that will make us feel guilty.

I vote for Vegas.

Saying Yes

2012-01-26T00:37:00.000-06:00

Got my game face on.

I will follow my passions to the end of the earth.

(Bonus? The earth has no end. Galileo says so.)

So last night I was very frustrated that things were going wrong. I was worried that D-Gang wanted to deck me and I was worried that My Mother was mad at me about a meatball. And I was worried that I will not be able to get through the bureaucratic nightmare of my ELL case study project.

D-Gang messaged me this morning and basically said that she would say No to me if I needed to be said No to.

So I said "Fine. Can I have a pony?"

And she said Yes.

SWEET! I am getting a Pony!

I am making baby steps in my Case Study. Right Hand needs verification from the Left Hand. So I didn't get a Yes, but I didn't get a No.

And My Mother affirmed that I didn't screw up the meatball thing. I think.

sigh

A couple of actors had a break through tonight at rehearsal. I have no idea why. Did something set in? Did they finally "get it"? Were they just in a good mood? Are they excited for opening ONE WEEK FROM TODAY????

I dunno.

sigh

If you are a parent, educator, or overall optimist you have probably discovered that it is important to say YES to a kid who wants to play. YES to a kid who wants to dream. YES to a kid who achieves a goal. YES to a kid who is trying.

Because people respond to YES.

Occasionally they respond to NO but NO eliminates possibilities. NO is an End Game.

YES means....."Where do we go from here?"

At least that is how I feel.

Like A Polar Bear In A Field Of Lavender

2012-01-25T01:02:00.003-06:00

I don't get it.

I feel like a Polar Bear in a field of Lavender.

Why do things go swimmingly with a process and then stop?

I have a TON of loose ends that are beyond my control dangling out there for my certification, Praxis, fieldwork, casestudy, etc.

I managed to break away and have lunch with My Favorite Sister. She says my that My Mother is mad at me because she made meatballs and I didn't stop by to get them. I *told* My Mother that we had rehearsal and Big Funny Kid was sick and I will not bring sickness into her house.

Meanwhile, the musical is at a place where
ALL MUSICALS ARE, 10 days before opening
.....utter chaos.
One thing comes together and another thing falls apart.

Yin and Yang, I suppose.

Calm before the storm? Perhaps D-Gang wants to deck me. She says "yes" to all my suggestions but I suggest a LOT.

Maybe she is just being nice.

She NEVER says "No" to me. Maybe she wants to. But she doesn't for some reason.

sigh

Here's the dealio with Yin/Yang: They chase each other.

And they balance each other out.

The Hallways of Always.

Who Do I Have To Hug To Find A Kite In The Winter?

2012-01-23T23:19:00.002-06:00

hee hee....

Only I didn't say hug. I said a different verb.

And it made D-Gang chortle.

I got enough done over the weekend for Grad School that I could spend the day running around and procuring a few items for the musical. Today I went to Nobbies (its like a party store), Hobby Lobby (self explanatory), Target, Kohls, K-Mart, TJ Max, Burlington Coat Factory, Marshalls, Payless Shoes, Toys-R-Us and finally the new Fancy Pants Goodwill.

I had many successes but one utter failure: Find a kite.

Actually, I just need the Kite rigging.

D-Gang already built a kite.

My other failure was to find Awesome Yellow Shoes being that the Converse Hightops that I ordered for Woodstock are now backordered. Grrrrr...... I have a whole "thing" going on for Woodstock. Woodstock is my signature on this show. (And the actress portraying Woodstock happens to be one of my favorite people at Awesome School.)

So there I was at Goodwill...my last stop of the day......totally deflated..... and I found these:

OK - this is a GOODWILL SCORE OF EPIC PROPORTION.

(I am sure that Moon would agree)

But can I make them yellow?

Why, yes. Yes I can.

Going to Lowes tomorrow to make a kite rig out of an extension cord plastic thingie. After my New Media Literacies class. In which I have an A.

I leave you with one of my favorite Woodstock and Snoopy Videos.

I may have to work up this dance with D-Gang.

Interestingly, I am not sure which one of us is Snoopy and which one of us is Woodstock. Seriously.

Colors In The Lines....Ocassionaly Sniffs Glue

2012-01-23T01:15:00.000-06:00

Another day of projects at Chez Loco.

Linus shirt almost done. Peppermint Patty shirt Proves Problematic but......we got it.

Each line on Linus' shirt takes 5 minutes to color in. There are 13 lines on front and 13 lines on back. Plus weird attempts to connect it from the sides. Plus the sleeves. My lines are pretty good. But my ability to color in the lines is Excellent. Shout out to Big Funny Kid's 8th Grade Science Project Board which allows me to work my magic.

Oh......and speaking of Big Funny Kid.....he and I worked on another "build" today. Specifically a shoulder mount for his camera.

Camera store closed. No Quick Release plate.

2 trips to Lowes.

At least 4 times I said to him "Do NOT EVER do what I am about to do." (while operating a chop saw).

1 time I said "Face the wall. Do not turn around. No matter how much I scream."

1 time he said to me "MOM! Do not sniff the All-Cement! It says so on the label!"

But we managed to get Phase 1 built.

He is happy. And that makes me happy.

Tomorrow: procure a kazoo, kite rigging, toilet paper, size 8 yellow high top Converse, more wig heads, a really good paint brush, and demographics for ELL students at my new school and for the state. Plus I have to re-write a lesson plan using the CCTC general standards for Special Education.

I took the wrong week to give up sniffing glue.

I Dunno - Yumi Screwed Up Lunch?

2012-01-22T01:28:00.000-06:00

Yep.

I learned something new today. Or did I?

So I am fairly digging on my 501 class Teaching English Language Learners. I had a ton of bureaucratic stuff to jump through but I get to work with an amazing person. I hope she doesn't blow me off. Her work load is crazy. And I am interjecting into her space.

Anyway, today's assignment was to watch an hour long TV show (not news) in a language that I am not familiar with. Being that I am oh so fluent in Spanish and French, I chose Japanese. I can't say a darn word in Japanese. (OK... I can say してくださいにホールド)

That sounds like "sho sho kumachi, kur ohh sigh" which means "hold on please".

My time working at an international answering service was not wasted.

ANYWAY - I watched an hour of an episodic Japanese TV show which Hulu says is called "Boys Before Flowers". As far as I can guess it was a teenage drama like "The Hills" or "Gossip Girl".

Here's the deal: I wrote an 11 page paper based on my experience. It is totally trippy to try to engage in something that is a language that you have never heard before. You go off of visual cues, preconceived ideas and vocal inflection......

And yet those components vary from culture to culture.

I had a giant headache.

Giant.

I finished my paper and actually couldn't refrain from clicking on the View Description tag of the show. The one line description was: “Jun-pyo asks Yumi to make the lunchbox again - proof that Yumi had taken credit for her lunch, which probably means she’s lying about the rest, too”.

WOW.....that isn't at ALL what I got out of that.

Anyway, here is the deal: School is tough enough. Transitions suck. Being in a foreign county and being plunked down in a classroom and being expected to perform like the "native speaking" kids is preposterous.

Since "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown" opens in a handful of days I will leave you with this image of Snoopy, telling Woodstock how hard it is to learn something in a totally foreign language....while being graded and expected to do well on Standardized Tests......lest your school be shut down.

Woodstock looks worried.

I am too.

Anxiety...(Chortle)

2012-01-21T23:09:00.002-06:00

FRIDAY, JANUARY 20TH

I think my parents were in this movie. Seriously..... I think My Mother barged through filming not realizing she was being filmed. I can't remember the whole story but my parents were in Vegas (total rarity).

Anyway, Vegas is the playground of Anxiety.

I had much Anxiety today as I approached my 501 class but I was SUPER stoked that I knew half of the people there. And the other half of the class seems really cool.

I see Smart Assed Chicken Guy
Yay!

I went on a costume hunt with D-Gang. We share a mutual Anxiety about costuming....so it was a darn good thing we went together. We make pretty good decisions together. Especially when I found my way OUT of the parking thingie next to our Favorite Costume Shop.

D-Gang chortled (she has the BEST chortle) "You ALWAYS get lost in this parking lot and you ALWAYS yell that the sign said 'Exit' and RIGHT WHEN YOU ARE ABOUT TO LOSE IT.....you Exit."

She chortled away all the way back to school

Meanwhile. Big Funny Kid was at a speech meet. He "updates" me but NEVER tells me the whole dealio. He texts "Round one over." "Round two over" "Round three over" "Headed home".

He gives me Anxiety during these events.

He brought home some bling.

Good work BFK!

I chortled.

I worked on costume stuff. Apparently there are a lot of lines on the costumes for "You're a Good Man Charlie Brown" and lines equal precision and math. And those things give me Anxiety.

Good Grief!!!

Take home lesson?

Anxiety is Energy. Happiness is Energy. Chortling is Energy.

Energy and Persistence Conquer All Things.

Weird...Whacky...Wonderful

2012-01-20T01:43:00.003-06:00

No. Seriously. That actually happened to me.

BUT that is not the point of this blog. In fact, I am not sure that I can get to the point of this blog because it is very, very late and I have had the Weirdest, Whackiest and most Wonderful 19 hours.

Today I stood in my former Middle School. I was flooded with memories that I didn't know that I had. I mean, we may remember our Experience in school but do we remember the layout? The artwork? The hallways?

And no, I did not just randomly go stand inside my former Middle School. I was there to meet with the Principal who agreed to host me for this semester's fieldwork.

The first thing I noticed was that there was a team of news cameras in the building. (Naturally, I assumed they were there for me.)

The second thing that I noticed is that the cafeteria was not nearly as large as it seemed when I fell on the first day of school with my tray of food while 800 students clapped and pointed and laughed.

The third thing I noticed was......an AMAZING amount of diversity.....students from at least 20 countries.....all blended together. Seated together. Eating together.

The Principal appeared to be a major component to the lunch-time process. Walkie-Talkie and rubber gloves. And yet.......connected. Present.

I introduced myself and he quickly whisked me towards the ELL portable classroom outside. I couldn't stand it any longer so I asked him what was up with the film crew.

"Oh....Blue Man Group was here.....watch your step."

I walked over the SAME buckle in the sidewalk that I walked over oh so many years ago.

"Whoa! Blue Man Group was here," I chirped...trying to keep up and trying not to look at the back of the school where I had my first kiss.

"Yes. We are a magnet school. We do a lot of community service. It is important to..." his voice trailed off as he opened the door to the portable. He briskly introduced me to a woman. He left.

Two Somali children were hunched over laptops.

Actually, there were 12 laptops.

And the woman he introduced me to has a double major in Language Training and Education Administration. She is working on her doctorate. She teaches mainstream ("content area") teachers differential instruction to meet the needs of ELLs.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME???????

I can't be sure but I am fairly swept off my feet. The woman I spoke with (who was sooooo patient with me and my dumb questions) is going to be my mentor for the next 10 weeks. She has already paired me with a student (ELL L2 Level B for those of you who like acronyms).

My preconceived notions exploded.

Like a scene from a JJ Abrams film.

Being that I am a person who believes in Unicorns, this is a good sign that I am on the right path.

I will not take a single moment of this process for granted!

Use Your Words

2012-01-19T00:41:00.006-06:00

words

Big Funny Kid has always had a great vocabulary and has always been very articulate.

His first word was "Apple". Not dada, not mama...."Apple".

He quickly came up with the phrase "Apple Doo Doo" to describe the grocery store. I have no idea why. (I was just glad he was talking because all that crying and grunting was NOT working out for me.)

Shortly after that he was saying "Nguyen Nguyen Tuck" for garbage truck.

Again - I had no problem adapting to his vernacular.

As he progressed to the Toddler Phase he would have occasional, yet typical, Toddler Meltdowns. And that is when I introduced the phrase "Use Your Words."

I occasionally *STILL* have to say that to him.

And, yes, he occasionally has to say it to me.

I bring this all up because I spent a great deal of my day and night working on my upcoming "Instruction for English as a New Language" course which is going to be INTENSE while finding out at Parent/Teacher Conferences that Big Funny Kid received a......uh......NOT good grade in French.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME???????

sigh

And yet this is not my point.

I need to use my words.

Bi-lingual students (either by choice or by circumstance) are going to have a HUGE advantage in their lives, if they have teachers that will help them to embrace their unique situation.. Language is integral all human endeavors.Under the right circumstance if a student speaks one language at home, can perform academically in another language and has the right supportive environment........then......

:

(Image from NASA).

There is no limit to what can happen!

We are a Global Community. We are part of a Participatory Culture. Language is the ethos that binds us together.

In other words:

The world is a wonderfully weird place, consensual reality is significantly flawed, no institutions can fully be trusted, certainty is a mirage security is a delusion, and the tyranny of the dull mind forever threatens.

Use. Your. Words.

(preferably without harm).

For My Consideration

2012-01-18T01:34:00.001-06:00

So it is Awards Season and as a card carrying member of the Screen Actor's Guild, I get certain perks around this time. Because of the economy, the perks have gotten less perky but I still manage to get a few DVD's sent my way.......for My Consideration.

Today I got Bridesmaids (stooopid), The Artist (hell yeah), Moneyball (Brad Pitt is easy on the eye), The Descendents (directed by a local guy) and The Help (I do not subscribe to a heartwarming film about a white woman's ability to share a black woman's perspective).

Later this week I will get online screenings of Midnight in Paris and My Week With Marilyn.

Having spent my whole day thinking about ELLs, SPEDS, ELPs, EOs while meeting the CCTC and NCATE guidelines...... I have much to consider.

I will figure it out.

In the word of ol' Bill Shakespeare: "We are such stuff as dreams are made on, rounded with a little sleep" (The Tempest).

Gonna sleep. Perchance to dream.

Much to consider.

I Know You Are But What Am I? (I Have A Doubt)

2012-01-17T00:57:00.004-06:00

I love to retort "I know you are, but what am I?"

It got me through MANY a schoolyard taunts. That and walking away from said taunts and pretending I was a character on the stage or screen.

But right now I am wondering - What Am I?

I met with some cool people today on a project and at the end of our meeting I mentioned that I was in graduate school. Marvelous Marvin didn't skip a beat and said "Oh - have you figured out what you want to be when you grow up?"

He wasn't taunting me.

He was sincerely curious.

I responded, "Geez, Marv, I am just trying to get through this meeting.....but I think I want to be a teacher."

He beamed.

"That is a good idea" was his response. He was totally genuine.

But every step I take towards my Masters in Education makes me worried. I love my professors and am inspired by the work I do but how can *I* make a difference in a system so daunting????

Seriously, folks. This Eduction Thing is a mess.

sigh

But I believe in the Future. How can you not??

sigh

Shout out to Dr. King who ALWAYS believed in the future of our Human Race.

I wish you were still here, Dr. King.

I wish I could hear how you feel about how things are going right now.

Whacky Winter

2012-01-16T00:57:00.002-06:00

Big Funny Kid decided to go snowboarding today.
In a state with no mountains.
And on a day that was (thankfully) 53 degrees.

MEANWHILE D-Gang apparently went jogging in shorts.

MEANWHILE My Mother decided to make cinnamon rolls and let me tell you what......That Woman can make some serious cinnamon rolls.

So *I* tried to stitch this whole thing together by making chili and hauling over a slight vat of it to D-Gang's house with 21 cinnamon rolls.

It is an apparently a Midwestern thing to pair chilli and cinnamon rolls.

Personally I missed this particular boat when I was growing up here

(I was happy with Spaghetti-O's).

OK.... so we descended on D-Gang's tribe with chili and cinnamon rolls.

It was.........delightful.

Child #1 (Murrbeth) was on her way out for an overnight/scavenger hunt thingie.

Child #2 was wearing her signature horse sweater and I found out that she doesn't care for the Huns.

Child #3 was beside herself that we were there. She was super focused on hugs and her new earrings and not very happy when her hair wrap ran amok.

Child #4 was dressed in the exact same pink leopard print jammies that I have. Not that she cared about this information. She was practicing her demure face when Big Funny Kid gave her another piece of cinnamon roll.

Child # 4 Twin was wearing a full-on dragon outfit. And he was SUPER appreciative of the raw broccoli. Have you ever seen a small kid in a dragon suit eat giant chunks of broccoli?? I have. Fascinating.

We retired to the basement.

We watched "Monster's Inc." and eventually tuned into the Golden Globes.

SUDDENLY Child #1 burst into the room with a camera. "I need a picture of a Ginger for our scavenger hunt".

I posed.

She left.

Tomorrow I *literally* go meet with a man who is going to build me a carousel. Plus school, plus parenting, plus rehearsal, plus a furnace issue.

What a Whacky Winter this has been.

I like whacky.

What's With the Omgrrl?

2012-01-15T02:42:00.004-06:00

every girl

is a

riot girrrl

OK. So a few short hundred years ago I moved back to Nebraska. And I was a yoga instructor and I was raising a small child under the tenants of: Truth, Magic, and Individuality. (I still raise him under those tenants.)

Anyway....I had to register my car here and I paid the extra bucks for my personalized license plate which reads:

OMGRRRL

Om being the classic sound that is produced from the back of the throat and (if performed in Vedic traditions) creates a space between your head and your heart for the purpose of making energy flow.

Around the same time that I was working on my yoga certification (Iyengar, for those of you who feel a need to Google) I was also part of a musical culture that included the Riot Grrl universe.

Oh and I gave birth to Big Funny Kid at the end of that whole scene.

So, yes. The 90's were a very interesting time to me.

So it only made sense in 1999 to brand myself as OmGrrrl. It seemed a great juxtaposition between Peace and Riot.

I stand by that decision.

Several people (like that one crazy toothless guy outside of JCPennys) like to think that the Om stands for Omaha .

Several others may wish to argue that I am no longer a Grrrrl. Because I am of a certain age.

I would like to take the opportunity to say that my monicker represents my belief in Peace and Personal Freedom.

And to suggest that you: Take time to sound OUT LOUD the noise in your heart. Repeat that noise as often a you want to.

Above all else: Occupy Yourself.

om, shanti shanti

And a little L7 for you.

Man the 90's were funny.

Wow Factor.

2012-01-13T23:34:00.002-06:00

I can clearly mark this day with one word......

WOW.

Wow can be good and Wow can be bad. It doesn't really matter. Suffice it to say that it is an exclamation of wonder.

It is an interjection.

It shows excitement or emotion.

It is generally set apart from a a sentence by an exclamation point (or by a comma when the feeling it not as strong.)

hee hee

If you remember this you will laugh,

If you don't, no biggie.

Anyway......the word "Wow" entered my mind several times today.

Wow is a triumph and a tragedy. It is sarcasm and sincerity.

Wow makes us want to quit and Wow inspires us to try for more.

Sometimes Wow just knocks us on our ass and leads us to the Abyss.

On the other hand, Wow upside down spells Mom. That's pretty cool.

sigh

(Yes....here is the video that reminds you about interjections.)

The Problem With Gingers

2012-01-13T02:04:00.003-06:00

Remind me to not relocate to New Zealand.

So Big Funny Kid loves to call me several nicknames, all of which include the word "Ginger".

Apparently in science class in 3rd grade he discovered that red-haired people are "genetic mutants". He was distraught when he told me this.

I just rolled my eyes and said "DUH!!!!"

Of course, now that he is a big highfaluting teenager, he thinks it is funny to address my hair color.

Truth be told, I kinda hated being a Ginger in middle school. I had the pasty skin and the freckles and the glasses to boot.

BUT - here is the deal with Gingers.

It is a Female Driven sort of thing. We are usually fiery, funny, fabulous and occasionally sexy.

Ginger Men??? Not so much.

I will conclude with the words of the only Ginger Man (Tom Robbins) that has ever made perfect sense to me:

Red hair is a woman's game.

The harsh truth is, most red-haired men look like blonds who've spoiled from lack of refrigeration. They look like brown-haired men who've been composted. Yet that same pigmentation that on a man can resemble leaf mold or junk yard rust, a woman wears like a tiara of rubies.

Not only are female redheads frequently lovely but theirs is a loveliness that suggests both lust and danger, pleasure and violence, and is, therefore, to the male of the species virtually irresistible.

Ginger were the tresses of the original femme fatale.

Now that women are demolishing those old misogynistic expectations, will redheads lose their special magic, will Pippi Longstocking come to be regarded as just one of the girls?

Hardly.

To believe that blondes and brunettes are simply redheads in repressive drag is to believe that UFOs are kiddie balloons.

All redheads, you see, are mutants.

(Amen, Mr. Robbins. Amen.)

I Swore

2012-01-12T00:42:00.001-06:00

Actually I swore a LOT today. Starting with the realization that I had a meeting with some fairly fancy people and I only had time to sport....god I can't even remember what I wore. But I didn't wear makeup and I smelled like ranch dressing. I *did* wear my sparkle boots and eventually someone said "Cute boots!"

I swore to be more perky during these things.

I got a text from Hutch. "It smells like SNOW!" God that woman is fanatical about snow. And the truth is that here in the Heartland it has been AMAZINGLY warm. Like I was barefoot yesterday when I got my mail.

I sent Hutch some carefully chosen swear words and ran home to change my clothes

Because I have more swearing to do.

Today I got sworn in as a Public Art Commissioner.

I assumed there would be a tickertape parade in front of the courthouse
after such an auspicious event.

And there WAS......

........in the form of snow and winds that literally gusted up to 45 mph. Have you ever been hit by a wind like that while wearing a giant coat wool coat from the 80's???? I swear it was the oversized shoulder pads that kept me from being totally airborne.

Believe you me, I swore and swore and swore all the way down the street to my car. When I got in my car and had the wind slam the door into my body before I sat down, I REALLY swore.

But, yay. I am Official.
And the Fancy Pants Project will work out.

I swear.

Of Chickens

2012-01-11T14:41:00.000-06:00

TUESDAY, JANUARY 10TH

Ok......seriously. If I can't have a Unicorn, I want these guys.

Smart Assed Chicken Guy went on vacay over Christmas break and apparently a few of his chickens were murdered. (His word).

I wondered what he meant by "murdered".

Like if a wild animal got at them, wouldn't they have been eaten? (Cuz you KNOW they taste like chicken.)

Or if they weren't tended to in his absence, wouldn't they have just died?

Maybe he meant murdered in some sort of sociopathic, ritualistic, way.

If you saw this movie, then you are laughing right now.

If you didn't see this movie, please spare yourself.

Anyway, however manner his chickens were murdered, he was fairly distraught. And that makes me sad because he is one of my only friends in Grad School. But today he sent me a picture of the little tykes in the above photo (no not the directly above photo......the one at the top.)

And DAMN those are some cute critters. Seriously. Like mini-llamas. Or alien Chewbaccas. (Assuming you accept the fact that Chewbacca is NOT an alien to begin with.)

Smart Assed Chicken guy had a name for them but I wasn't paying attention because I was too busy trying to figure out how to make little hats for them.

Or sweater vests.

Costumes.... A Uniform For The Moment

2012-01-09T23:40:00.001-06:00

I rather like Costume Rooms.

Mine is modest. But if you were to ask me if I have something for a pimp, a pirate, a fairy, a steampunk, an ostrich, several version of fairies or anything with glitter, I would simply roll my eyes and say...... "Of course.......DUH!"

Anyway...... I went on another costume hunt with D-Gang today and we ended up in the Costume Room at Plywood Whisperer's school. And let me tell you that this space is LOVELY! Soooooo well-organized and well.......Organized.

We pulled a few pieces and D-Gang kept muttering "That is my coffee pot." "That was from a show I did at such-and-such school." She was rather nostalgic.

I was enjoying the space and trying not to get distracted.

Suddenly she said "Did you look at that white dress?"

Uh - no. I didn't. It wasn't on my radar. We don't need a white dress.

"That was my prom dress in High School", she offered.

OH, REALLY????????

So I checked it out. It was hideous. And yet hauntingly familiar.

I held the dress in my hand and she said "I had to have a high neck."

I said "Was this a Gunny Sax dress from the 80"s?" D-Gang wasn't sure......

Baa Haa Haa. It occurred to me that I had the same dress. And I used a seam ripper to take the high neck off.

My Mother does not seem amused.

My Favorite Sister is *still* looking for Santa Claus.

I like costumes. They smell good. They contain a history. They get re-purposed. They inspire.

Gonna Keep This Short

2012-01-09T01:17:00.000-06:00

Mostly Beowulfed my paper about Youth, Digital Media, Ethics and Participatory Culture. I rather like the subject but am not a big fan of the articles that I was given to analyze. MySpace study???? REALLY???

I had a chili cheese burger with Big Funny Kid.

We had a great discussion about the problems facing today's White Youth:

sigh

Going to bed.

Not before I post this image on Big Funny Kid's Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, etc,.

Shop Vac and Powdered Sugar

2012-01-08T02:01:00.002-06:00

(Already My Mother is sending a scathing email

due to this image)

I packed up every stupid inch of Christmas today. I wrapped up every Nutcracker, individually wrapped precious ornaments. I tore down the tree and the "outdoor display".

blah blah blah.

I pulled in the Shop Vac and sucked every piece of tinsel off that tree.

(The Shop Vac is called Noo Noo.)

I went to the storage unit and rotated the holiday storage boxes.

Buh-Bye Christmas. Don't let the door hit you in the ass.

I came home and continued to work on my New Media Literacy paper. It is going swimmingly except for the fact that I am 15 pages over my assignment requirement.

sigh

So I decided to make a Moroccan Party.

yes.....I have a clay Tangine dish thingie

I made a lamb tangine and decided to make a B'stilla (a Moroccan chicken pot pie with powdered sugar on top). I think it turned out pretty well but I didn't know what to do with the B'stilla leftovers..... So I took a picture of it.

can you smell the cumin?

the cinnamon?

the tumeric?

Big Funny Kid had a friend over who had neither eaten Lamb nor had Moroccan food. I think I managed to check those things off of his Bucket List.

Chez Loco: We suck up the tinsel, try to figure things out and end up creating something yummy.

More importantly, we love having friends here.

Do You Remember Your First?

2012-01-06T23:48:00.004-06:00

First kiss? First book? First heartache?

First grade? First friend? First toy?

First disappointment? First triumph? First job?

First loss? First win? First injustice?

First escargot? First flat tire? First beer?

Do you remember your first step?????????

I don't.

Barf Vader won't.

But today she threw down some first steps.

She also threw down her first Face Plant.

She got up.....and wandered off.

Towards the light (and the toys)

Rock on, Barf Vader.

Because if you can walk, then you can march.

If you can march, then you can dance.

And if you can dance, then you will always feel the pulse of Life.

I love you.

Boldness Be My Friend

2012-01-05T23:16:00.000-06:00

This day made me crazy.

Back to back meetings this morning of an.....obligatory nature. I tried to put my best "Yes I Am Totally Interested" face on:

But mostly I was writing a paper in my mind......and trading Shakespearean Insults with D-Gang on my phone under the table.

SHE has the luck of being a bonafide teacher person and her middle schoolers are apparently starting their Shakespeare unit and as such she has introduced them to what can seem to be a daunting language by teaching them how to insult someone in the tongue of The Bard.

Either that or she was just being random with me.

It doesn't really matter because it made me laugh. While I was trying to look interested. While coming up with an awesome Articulation Theory. (And yes, I do have one.)

I stopped by My Mother's house. I even brought my own canned pasta product in case she couldn't come through. But she did. And I REALLY worked hard on not putting my hands around her bony throat because she apparently decided to have new carpet installed. Yeah - New Carpet Outgassing is EXACTLY what someone in her respiratory situation needs.

"I wore a mask.....and LOOK! I am drinking a nutrition shake," she chirped.

God bless her. She is trying to get better and yet keeps making choices like she is fine. But she isn't fine.

But she is cute.

sigh

Rehearsal tonight was AWESOME because My Crazy Angel Knitting Pineapple Pajama Jean Wife of My Love Child Named Heather was there. OK......that is just the nickname I came up at this moment in time. Actually, this woman has SEVERAL nicknames to me. And I will have to settle with something more generic. ERGO - she will henceforth be called......

baa ha ha ha ha....I can't......too many funny things come to mind......

OK, OK, OK....... For the sake of this blog I shall call her Twinkle Toes.

So Twinkle Toes put the cast through their paces with a new dance number and it was brilliant. So many of these kids are showing true signs of "getting it".

Another dance rehearsal tomorrow.....And I HAVE to get a grip on this paper. And meet with my new Principal. And go on a costume hunt with D-Gang. And make sure My Mother is still breathing.

In the words of Billy Shakespeare:

Time and the hour run through the roughest day.

Springing That Serious Gourmet S***

2012-01-05T00:39:00.003-06:00

Much to my Questioning Angst, I allowed Big Funny Kid to watch "Pulp Fiction" with me during break. On the One Hand, he is reaching a certain point in maturity and film-making that I think he needed to see this film.

On the Other Hand.....well - it is a bit inappropriate.

(My favorite part during the screening is when BFK kept saying

"OH! You say that all the time!")

And truthfully, I don't think he "got" most of the brilliance. But he was exposed to it. In the paraphrased words of Jules (played so aptly by Samuel L. Jackson), I sprung some serious Gourmet S*** on him.

moving on.....

So today, we sprung some serious gourmet-ness on the cast of Charlie Brown in the form of Dave Barrus. Yes THAT Dave Barrus. The dude who co-founded The Broadway Dreams Foundation. Featured artist in the Broadway touring version of Les Miserables....he has released a TON of CD's. You cut this guy and he bleeds Broadway!

I pretended to look at a stage light

just to take this picture.

moving on.....

I got home today and had this Lil' Jar of Awesomeness delivered to me by a very apologetic postal worker who said she was sworn that I had to sign for it.

Winter Truffles, my friends.

Serious Gourmet-ness will occur with these yummy guys.......Eventually.

My point? Expose yourself and those you love to The Real Deal. Some will get it. Some will balk. Some will get it a long time from now. Some won't notice.

Just keep it real.

Systems of Thinking - Taxonomy for the 21st Century

2012-01-03T23:41:00.004-06:00

Don't worry.

I won't inundate you with the thesis that I am working on for my New Media Literacies course.

Suffice it to say that if you are reading this blog you are already part of the Participatory Culture that is our current reality. I will simply state that Media Literacy has certain pedagogical implications and I certainly am excited about addressing them.

Yeah, so OBVIOUSLY I am back in school.

Big Funny Kid starts back tomorrow.

As such, he got to be a guest in my class this morning. Cuz I have the shiny object that we are discussing - a teenager! The rest of my classmates have no kids, small kids or grown up kids. But *I* have the coveted teenaged kid. So he laid down some Truth in my 506 class. I was proud of him for being willing to share in the discussion.

As far as I am concerned, no matter what your age or your interest is in life - we ALL have something to learn from one another.

MEANWHILE..........

I owe the Recently Graduated Theatre Arts Class a big apology because I was supposed to have pizza and hugs with them tonight and I was completely immersed in my school work that I couldn't make it.

Shiny Happy Glitter Boy sent me a picture of the pizza I was missing out on.

Damn.

I missed out on some good food with some GREAT people. I hope I get to see them before they all scatter back to their various colleges. I really love these kids.

So, yeah. It is back to academic Game On here at Chez Loco. I am surrounded by paper and computers. BFK has GOT to realize that schoolwork is now more important than his film projects (which by the way, are very impressive) and D-Gang and I have to Beowulf that Musical.

Thank goodness she is the one carrying the sword into this particular battle. I am just backup, support and a sounding board for her thoughts.

Oh - and SOMEHOW I gotta make a kid's hair look like this:

And I am NOT playing the Wig Card. I already played that one with Seussical.

Gonna have to keep my Systems of Thinking sharp.

   i. reason effectively but embrace the non familiar
     ii. be able to analyze a variety of outcomes
     iii. reconcile information and conflicts and accurately draw a reasonable conclusion
   iv. sample and remix content through appropriation
     v. challenge everything

hee hee

Outline for paper just got Beowulfed.

booh-yeah

Of Beowulf and Bacon

2012-01-02T22:42:00.001-06:00

Yeah, yeah I know I said that I am not going to make New Year's resolutions. And I am not.

Because a resolution, by definition, is merely an expression of intention. Sure it has the root in the word 'resolve' which seems soooooo concrete but if you look at the whole concept of resolve or resolution it is really just a state of mind - not really an Act of Doing.

Now......"Beowulfing a Grendel" is stating an action.

At least in MY mind.

ANYWAY: I have several Grendels that are in need of Beowulfing.

Several.

But the one that I am referring to in this post is Graduate School. And Fieldwork. And subsequent testing and licensing and case studies and all that good stuff. The faster and mightier that I lay my Vorpal Sword into this Jabberwocky, the sooner I can get into a classroom. (and yes, I just combined two epic metaphors).

Because there is a lot of crap that brings me down that I don't blog about. But the reason I don't blog about that stuff is because I am so fulfilled with the stuff that makes me Happy: Big Funny Kid, my Family, my Friends, my Future.

And bacon.

I believe.

2012: The Year of the Beowulf. Or The Year of the Bacon. Either works for me.

The Year The World Ends

2012-01-02T20:26:00.000-06:00

Sunday, January 1st, 2012

I looked back at my first blog of 2011. Apparently I had some lofty goals like exercising (didn't do it ONCE in all of 2011) and not texting while driving (that lasted about 3 days). On the upside - I did vow to figure out what I am gonna be when I grow up and with my first semester of grad school under my belt, I am working on that one.

So la di da. It is 2012. After last night's festivities we are all pretty wiped out. In fact Big Funny Kid is down for a nap and I might just let that carry through until the morning for him. Because this holiday break is coming to a close and we have a New Year to conquer.

I am not EVEN going to make any resolutions like I did last year. Oh wait - is that in and of itself a resolution?

I will simply say this: 2012 YOU BETTER NOT SUCK.

It Was Brought

2012-01-01T18:24:00.004-06:00

SATURDAY, JANUARY 31ST

How does one prepare for a New Year's Eve party for a bunch of teens? Well - you make Cupcake Pops and put them in a festive display.

And you combine 3 different kinds of Jello in a mold that looks like a brain.

(In case the zombies come).

You look the other way when a GIANT Nerf gun war breaks out.

(And indeed you may help orchestrate it.)

You provide adult supervision when the fireworks are launched.

You try to provide fezes and only sing "Sister Christian" ONE time.

You encourage Jam Sessions

and marvel at the talent.

You make sure that the only shenanigans that take place are the ones that you create yourself. You let people stay up waaaaaaaay too late.

You make eggs, bacon and cinnamon rolls.

You take a moment to realize that you just spent the evening with leaders of our future.

And you feel pretty good about that.

Bring It

2011-12-30T21:08:00.002-06:00

It is a well documented fact that I am insane.

But only if you are someone who thinks a Disco Ball

or a Diamond is insane.

In which case, just refer to me as "mufti-faceted".

So when Big Funny Kid wanted to invite a dozen or so of his friends over for a New Year's Eve party, I said "Sure!" We were planning a get together anyway - let's add more kids!

But I am also a Mom. So there are some clear-cut rules. BFK is cool with that. In fact he is a little bewildered as to why I have such clear-cut rules.

DUH!

I used to be a teenager.

Thank god I have since regressed and am now simply a toddler.

And BFK has a heart almost as Big as his Funny. And he wanted to simply invite everyone in the world that he has known or will ever know. He was worried that someone would feel bad for not being invited.

And I had to be a hard-ass and say no. 12 kids. For 2012. All are allowed to spend the night and in fact are encouraged to spend the night because I don't want them or their parents on the road after midnight.

I have snacks and hats and sodas for the evening and 3 pounds of bacon, 3 dozen cinnamon rolls and 36 eggs for the morning.

I have a killer tiara and have been practicing my Very Best Demure Face should I be asked to come sing Sister Christian on Rockband.

"What is that, children?

Oh, I couldn't possibly come sing for you.

No really. You mustn't be so insistent.

I am a lady."

Ringing in the New Year with a dozen teens? Bring it.

Time Out

2011-12-30T12:31:00.000-06:00

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 29TH

I woke up. I cleaned. I cleaned some more.

I cooked, I cleaned.

I cooked again.

Then I cleaned.

What am I???? Donna Reed?????

Big Funny Kid was off to see a movie, Small Fry was incessantly playing video games and Little Miss is preparing her room for a new paint job.

Sooooo.....I *finally* sat down and cracked open one of the books that I got for Christmas. "The Element" by Sir Ken Robinson. I do love me some Sir Ken. I saw him speak a few years ago and can honestly say that his philosophy and wisdom (and humor) was the missing link that made me decide to get my Masters in Education.

A few moments later Big Funny Kid came home and looked at me funny. "Are you OK?"

"Yes, I think so."

"You look......weird.....or mad."

I thought about that observation and said "Oh - you are not used to me sitting down and reading a book."

"That's what it is!"

Good lord. I went back to reading until some appliance beeped (the laundry and the dishwasher love to beep) and I sighed and set my book down to resume whatever dharma awaited.

I didn't get back to my book for the rest of the day but I *did* manage to pop by D-Gang's place for a visit. The little ones were in bed but a few minutes after I arrived the door opened and The Boy Whose Eyes Reach Into My Soul emerged, with a big ol' "Am I Gonna Get Away With This" grin on his face.

He got away with it and I had a little lap time with him while he had a very animated and somewhat stern talking to the Nutcracker across the room.

Being around D-Gang and her family is definitely time well spent.

P.S. If you are curious about Sir Ken Robinson, you can check out his TED talk here. It is about 30 minutes - it is worth your time, I promise.

Make Her Say Bad Words

2011-12-30T00:16:00.000-06:00

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 28TH

8 bajillion hours at the Cell Phone Provider store.

All because Santa brought Big Funny Kid a certificate good for an iPhone.

Thanks, Santa. Your work is done. You are totally chilling at the North Pole with your feet elevated and your reindeer are asleep.

*I* have to go to the Cell Phone Provider store

and make this Christmas Miracle come through.

We got there and it was FILLED with people with really, really, really dumb questions while 2 employees of questionable intelligence tried to negotiate through their moments.

Even though BFK was close enough to me to step on my feet several times, we just texted each other. And we did a mental force-push at each and every person who walked through the door.

Damn you Santa. Why must I endure all those things that don't occur naturally in your workshop??????

We got through it.

And our texts were hilarious.

BFK got his new phone. It has a "host" that will talk to you. I believe her official name is Siri.

So we got in the car and I told him, "The first thing I better hear from Siri is 'What Up (expletive)?"

BFK blushed and explained that his phone won't say such a thing unless I texted it to it.

Pssssht. Had it texted before I even started the car's engine.

His phone "spoke" the words that I sent.

Big Funny Kid and I laughed until we couldn't see straight.

Moments

2011-12-28T00:35:00.004-06:00

Moments happen.

If you are lucky you get to catch most of them in your hands.

The first Moment of the day was getting a phone call at 5:00 this morning from My Favorite Sister. Barf Vader was....I dunno.....breathing weird? Making strange coughing noises?

I didn't really need the particulars....I got in my car.

Dad was there holding her. My Favorite Sister was racing around like a mad person. I looked at Barf Vader and gave her my signature "Dinosaur" greeting. Usually I get some kind of response from her. But I got nothing.

I kicked a bunch of crap out of the path of the doorway and off they went to the ER.

I don't fret in a crisis. Fretting does no one any good. And my job was to hold down the house and be there for Cupcake.

Bottom line: Croup.

Been There.....sat-in-a-steamy-bathroom-with-a-baby Done That.

It seems like Hell if you are a new parent.

They got back. Cupcake was still asleep. I hissed at the cat and gave a dinosaur RAWR to Barf Vader. She didn't smile but she did give me her signature "look". And she reached out her arms for me. I held her for a moment and gave her back to her mom who was apologizing and thanking me.

I hissed at the cat one more time and then took off.

TONS to do and I was soooooo pleased to find out that D-Gang and the females of her peeps were also running errands nearby. So I met up with them.

And that was awesome.

The Girl Who Has My Heart held my hand. I rather like having my hand held. If for no other reason, it keeps me from running out into the street in front of cars.

Meanwhile, Big Funny Kid, Little Miss and Small Fry are all together at last. Ham was consumed. Presents were opened. Laughter abounds.

And That Man I Love gave me a Toilet Seat.

Which I totally wanted.

Installation may be a different matter entirely.

Here is the bottom line.

(go ahead and click. 24 seconds of your life.
And although that is MY philosophy
the smile at the end is a smile I get from BFK all the time!)

Forever Young

2011-12-26T22:43:00.007-06:00

Baaaaaaa Haaaaa Haaaaa Haaaaaa.

Hoffman would kill me if he knew I posted this picture on my blog.

Tonight I saw my beloved Hoffman - haven't exchanged hugs with this guy for a looooooong time. But he was VERY much a part of my High School Life. Hoffman was his nickname then and it is now. In fact Hoffman was also a verb and an adjective back in the day. "Hoffman Party" was a way to describe a party. "Are you gonna Hoffman?" was a way to inquire if one was going to a Hoffman Party.

Don't get me wrong. We didn't just party all through high school. We also.......danced. And wore costumes. And "dated" each other even though most of the core girls knew that these core guys were gay.

And I loved me some Hoffman then.

And I still do.

Oddly, tonight the conversation tonight turned to our parents. Whom we have ALWAYS referred to by their first names. Back in the day, it was almost a form of cynicism. But tonight we all laid down the list of ailments, strokes, and even deaths that have transpired to those people who put up with our shenanigans oh so long ago.

GASP!

It occurred to me that I was roughly Big Funny Kid's age when I met Hoffman.

And it occurred to me that I love hanging out with Big Funny Kid's friends.

GASP AGAIN.....

And it occurred to me that a bajillion years from now, he might be sitting at their local haunt. FLO-rence, Squirrel, The One I Want to Hug, Murrbeth, Spaz the Pirate, Mini D-Gang, Quiet One, Shiny Happy Glitter Boy......... all those kids I love so well........ may be inquiring how *I* am doing.

sigh

I can only hope that Big Funny Kid will be proud to report that I am performing to Standing Room Only crowds at an Old People home in the Catskills. Singing "Sister Christian" 4 times a week. While D-Gang and Hutch perform as my backup dancers.

While My Mother makes us all Spaghetti-O's.

Cuz here is the secret, my friends.


link to song (the 80's were hilarious) yes click there My Mother.

Fill Up The Good Plates

2011-12-26T12:48:00.000-06:00

Someone should check underneath that pile

for a gift card

Or a small child

Sunday, December 25th

2 Christmases needed to be executed today. In two different states.

I myself was in 1 state - a state of Resignation.

And I got through the first Christmas and headed to the second. My plan was to get there a little early and help My Mother with Christmas Day dinner.

Many families have turkey or ham but we have MEAT - and a ton of it.

So I got to My Mother's house and it was quiet. A little too quiet. It is 4:00 - we are supposed to eat at 4:30 and.......um......let's just say that stuff wasn't in the state it should be. The tables looked lovely. Dad was hauling up chairs from the basement and all the dishes were set out. The good ones.

But My Mother was on a nebulizer. And the meat was still in the refrigerator. Actually most of the evening's feast was still in the refrigerator....and it occurred to me that perhaps My Mother isn't Wonder Woman and maybe even though she has been out of the hospital for a couple of weeks, she maybe should not have taken on a giant dinner for 20 people.

So I found an apron and rolled up my sleeves.

She had found a recipe for a sauce she wanted me to make. Only it called for shallots and she bought leeks. It called for garlic gloves and she has powdered garlic. It called for beef stock and she had bouillon cubes.

sigh

Let us be clear, I make fun of My Mother's cooking all the time. But this is not one of those times. The poor woman was waaaaaaaay out of her league and the sad thing is that this meal is totally normally in her league. Normally.

The rest of the gang showed up and we got it done. It was served up hot. I think people enjoyed it....I didn't really sit down. Which is fine. Hell, My Mother hasn't sat down to a hot meal for over 40 years.

I found myself asking myself (as I have for the entire month of December) WHY DO WE ALL PUT OURSELVES THROUGH ALL THIS CRAP? And when I say WE I mostly mean all the WOMEN.......Shopping, lists, decorating, baking, driving around, spending money we don't have..........WHY?????

I don't really have an answer except for the fact that for many of us, we do what we do because that it how it has always been done. There is a comfort in tradition. There is a certain excitement in sharing a meal with your WHOLE giant, wacky, crazy family. On the good plates. The ones that all those people before us have eaten on. The people that many of us never met.

And there is a certain level of peace in knowing that eventually other people will be gathering and eating long after you are gone. On the good plates.

Hanging with My Peeps

2011-12-25T00:11:00.001-06:00

I heart my family.

So here we are: Yours Truly, My Favorite Sister, My Mother and Dad: doing the traditional Christmas Eve family paparazzi session.

We are rather adorable.

We pose for a Family Picture every single Christmas eve.

Here is one from the 80's. (obviously)

Dad doesn't look so jolly. I think he was still adjusting to the fact that I had shaved off one side of my head. My Favorite Sister looks like she has had a stroke but if you look closely you may notice that I have her in a death grip with both hands so I had probably just told her that Santa isn't coming. And My Mother looks.......rather Saintly.

That's odd. Because of all the people in that photo that I gave the most amount of trouble to, it was her.

I already paid tribute to the Holy Trinity that is Dad and his brother and sister in last year's blog. If you haven't read it....go ahead.

Anyway, I am pleased to report that these fine folks are rocking their Siblinghood once again this year:

Just like they have for over 60 years.

(Note to self: next year get similar clothing from this picture and make them re-enact the pose.

Bonus points if I can get my Aunt to show off her knees)

I rather enjoyed a great deal of hang time tonight with Barf Vader who was wearing the I Heart Santa outfit I got her. And believe you me, I thought long and hard about switching the last three letters around to see if anyone noticed.

And I also told Cupcake that I will NOT pose in a picture with her.

I also told her that tomorrow was NOT Christmas. It is Don't Wear Underwear Day.

(My Favorite Sister is gonna kill me for that one.)

I Needed A Hug

2011-12-24T14:33:00.002-06:00

So I got one....actually I got 6.
And one that I can administer any time I want.

Friday, December 23rd

So today was rather an arduous and yucky day and in the end I found myself needing a hug. My plans with D-Gang for the evening changed but I didn't see any reason not to invite myself over in hopes of a hug.

Plus I had that NASTY candy that My Mother makes to deliver.

It is called Divinity and in my opinion it is disgusting but D-Gang loves it and My Mother loves making it.

Out of idle curiosity, I Googled this stuff. It first appeared in American cookbooks in 1915. Although it’s not verifiable, food historians believe that the candy got its name from the taste: most likely someone referred to the confection as “divine.”

I think it tastes like butt.

So D-Gang got her Divinity and I got my hugs from all five of those people in the top photo. Plus one from D-Gang.

They also gave me that red cloth under their picture. It is a meditation shawl from Nepal commonly referred to as a Pashmina. It is made from fibers of the mountain goats of the Himalayas who know a thing or two about being cold. And so this particular Pashmina should keep me warm.

And I will wrap it around my arms and shoulders like a hug - anytime I feel that I need one.

And I will think lovingly of D-Gang's wacky, wonderful family and how nice they are to me and how they truly are Divine.

sigh

And A Good Time Was Had By All

2011-12-23T18:44:00.000-06:00

Here we are being silly.

Here we are being serious.

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 22ND

OK - actually we were just plain silly.

So My Pretend High School Sweetheart came over for another Super Supper Party and, as usual, brought a few friends who quickly became my Very Favorite People. 2 Hilarious Sisters and his new "beau" (his word, not mine.......I would call him My Pretend High School Sweetheart's Actual Sweetheart but that might be too long of a nickname...... so I am considering Dr. Potato Patter as an alternative.)

Aaaaaaanyway - tonight's food theme was Rustic French and I made some amazing chicken

On the one hand, this is a photo of raw chicken

On the other hand - can't you just almost smell the AWESOME?

(recipe courtesy of Thank You Kevin)

I also put together some delicious appetizers:

4 kinds of Brie

Puff Pastry

No Yet Baked.

(recipe courtesy of My Wife)

And we had potatoes fried in duck fat. And there are no pictures because they were simply too busy being inhaled to pose for a photo.

It was a lovely evening. Big Funny Kid held his own and was enjoyed by all. That Man I Love did the dishes, even though I didn't ask him to.

Aaaaaand - we all ended up in the basement playing Rockband.

Big Funny Kid Facebooked: "Playing rockband with a bunch of 40 year olds is so different then playing rockband with teens... Save me."

Pssssht. He loved every minute of it!

It was a lovely way to launch the impending holidays.

Friends, food and laughter. My Favorite Things.

Shine On

2011-12-21T23:58:00.003-06:00

So, I got my final grades today for my first semester of Grad School.

4.0.

But I am waaaaaaaaay not out of the woods. My goodness I have so many tests and clearances and papers and observations and pedagogy........

So 4.0 is nice, but I am about to get REAL on this thing. Paper due Jan 3rd and Big Girl classtime starting Jan 16. High Needs schools. ELL case study. Then full-time classroom work in the Spring.

I like the hands-on stuff. But for every hands-on situation comes a giant paper. It's cool. It is what we call the "Reflective Cycle". You can't just do stuff without analyzing it. And you can't just analyze articles without actually doing stuff.

IN THE MEANTIME..........

It is frickin' Christmas. This photo sums up the total effort that That Man I Love has given to Christmas.

It is a couple of pilsner glasses that I suggested he wash.

Then I provided him with the packaging.

So he can give it to some co-worker.

MEANWHILE - here is what I have been up to:

And, no. This isn't a contest. This is merely an exercise in awareness.

Children, Family, Extended Family, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, Divorced People Situations..........

The Holidays are too crazy.
But you have to carve out what is important.

As such, I have been cooking and cleaning with Joyful Abamdon in my heart in anticipation of tomorrow night's Super Supper Party. The marinating chicken smells divine. Garlic, figs, capers, spanish olives, sundried tomatoes, olive oil, Cabernet vinegar/Olive Oil........

Sooooooo.......

Here is to Me (for now):

Shine on,

you Crazy Diamond.

Suddenly......UGH!!!!

2011-12-20T23:22:00.000-06:00

Silly me.

I planned on chilling for a few hours today.

I figured I had a head start on the Christmas thingie and my "parties" don't start for another day. Big Funny Kid says he's "got it" in terms of his finals. Rehearsal wasn't until 3.

But I woke up screaming.

At first I thought the Christmas tree was on fire. Seriously.

Then I guess I fell back asleep and I dreamed that there was this thick Bile-Like Goo dripping from the ceiling. And all of the toilets.

I woke up For Real and my jaw hurt.

I shook it all off and got Big Funny Kid ready for school. The Dog We Named After a Porn Star went outside. I wiped the sleep from my eyes and started breakfast. And logged onto 2 computers. Only to find out that the internet was down again. Breakfast burned.

I got back from school and went back to the task at hand.

I had just barely gotten the network running when I found out that I had an IMMEDIATE interview with a new school.

And I got a 97% on my Final Giant Paper. (YAY)

And My Favorite Sister wanted to meet for lunch.

at the FREAKING MALL

FOR REALZ????

Suddenly I was in the car and off to the mall. When I finally found a parking space and raced inside, Cupcake and Barf Vader were on Santa's lap. My Mother was about to open a can of Whup Ass at Panera because there were no tables, Cupcake was running around screaming "Ni Ni Monster" and Barf Vader just gave me this "Are You Kidding ME????" look.

I shot her the same look. She wanted to be on my lap and I fed her God Knows What from a plastic spoon. She smashed things with her little hands. Her feet were cold. My Mother looked exhausted.

I raced off to rehearsal. I decided to get there early to finish up all the school-y things I needed to do. D-Gang was quick to let me know that the Holiday Program was taking place in the theatre but I could join her in the booth.

I did.

I haven't seen her for awhile and I peered through the window at Child #3 who was not singing and not looking at her conductor. But she managed to spy me in the spot light window and waved. Her mama had done candy cane colored beads in her hair. It took 3 hours.

And suddenly it was rehearsal time. The breakfast and lunch thing hadn't worked out so well so I texted Big Funny Kid to bring me some chips and he did.

D-Gang staged a pretty darn cool scene, if I do say so myself. (and I do.)

sigh. Suddenly it is Christmas.

OK..... I leave you with this:

the audio

My Dance Card is Filling Up

2011-12-19T21:14:00.001-06:00

This day was shit. Dark, tarry, hardened shit.

There. I said it. And My Mother will admonish me.

BUT - I am noticing that there are a few fun things coming up over the course of the next 10 days.

Cathy Rigby is having a "holiday coffee" which is a "cookie exchange" or "bring diapers for the homeless" or something. I am not quite clear about the whole deal but I like coffee and cookies and diapers, so I am game.

And My Pretend High School Sweetheart has put together an impromptu dinner party at my place and I am having fun putting together the menu (Rustic French). Oh and he has a new beau that I get to meet. And he is bringing two other friends that I think I remember. I like having Super Supper Parties with him.

D-Gang and I have a date. We call it a "hall pass". She suggested that we see the local theatre company's rendition of "A Christmas Carol". Thank god she was joking.

Oh and we have 5 - yes 5 Christmases this year. Seriously. And ok, I am not actually looking forward to all 5 of them. But a couple should be nice.

Oh and another dear friend from high school is going to be in town and I haven't seen him forever and he is delicious and we are going to get together.

And there are some stirrings about having a New Year's Eve party here at Chez Loco. Hutch would be in on that one.

And I am contemplating a new flavor for my Holiday Candied Bacon. It may or may not involve jalapeno.

Lest Ye Be Judged

2011-12-19T00:11:00.003-06:00

So mostly, in Life, I observe.

Always, in life, I participate.

Rarely, in life, do I Judge.

Right off the bat, I must admit that I don't ascribe to an Organized Religious Format per se. But as it pertains to Western European-Based theology, I kinda like two particular tenements:

Do Unto Others as You Would Have Them Do Unto You.

and
Judge not, lest Ye be Judged.

But I was a wee bit nervous tonight because I was going to a Mega Church for a Teen Talent Show. (Big Funny Kid was playing in his band at said Churchy Talent Show. And against my better Judgment, I let him participate even though he has 2 finals tomorrow.)

And I didn't know what to wear. I changed my clothes a thousand times. Didn't want to show cleavage, didn't want skulls to be an issue, didn't want to offend. So I wore all black with my Angel Wings sweater.

Plain boots.

I got to the Mega Church and I gotta tell you that the Teen Center was GINORMOUS. I delivered my unwrapped toys to the Toy Drive and made my way into the space. And it was filled to the rafters with teens and families. And they have better sound and lighting equipment than most equity-waiver theatres I have been in. I found a place on a VERY comfy leather theatre chair and sat quietly.

I contemplated the concept of Judgment and worked very hard on not Judging the scene.

People seemed happy. Sugary drinks were abundant. Teens were teens. Everyone looked so clean and shiny. Not in a Bling-Bling way. Just in a Shiny Happy People way.

I wasn't made to feel uncomfortable except for that One Lady who gave me a crusty look when I went to the table to grab some popcorn. In retrospect, I think she was a Churchy Food Lady and she knows everyone and she realized I was not part of the situation and she just wanted to make sure that her popcorn wasn't squandered.

The boys followed a film of a slam poet who did a piece on Original Sin. He was a very good slam poet and the film was well produced. Personally, I think the Original Sin issue might be a bit over top to begin with and so to hear it in a Slam Poetry context was a bit.....interesting.

The boys did well

(even though their song was about teenaged lust.

Perfect way to follow the Original Sin thingie

hee hee)

Oh - I forgot to mention that the "theme" for the deal was "Ugly Sweater". As such the building was FILLED with folks wearing surreal sweaters. The emcee's rawked their Ugly Sweaters and told really bad holiday jokes. They certainly were enthusiastic about their ministry and I refuse to pass judgment on that.

The boys got 3rd, but only 1st and 2nd got a Pocket Bible as a prize. The Judges told them that they did well.

It was an interesting evening. I am hopeful that they toys I brought for the toy drive will make a child smile on Christmas day. I am uncomfortable in the fact that Big Funny Kid should have been home studying for finals tonight but I think that an Experience is important too.

Who am I to Judge?

Halls Decked

2011-12-18T01:10:00.000-06:00

Yeah. Whatever.

I put out some lighting thingies. I smashed a wreath onto the door.

I made an AMAZING dinner.

15 Years of Nutcrackers went on display.

Kids were funny.

The Tinsel Dance was danced.

Halls got decked.

And my "little space" in the Universe is up in effigy.

This part of the "holidays" is OK.

This part is NOT

sigh

The Dance of Balance

2011-12-16T22:18:00.002-06:00

I didn't have class today. So I took the money that I would have given the children to buy me Christmas presents and a coupon that I got and I had.......a massage.

For an hour.

Here is the dialogue that took place:

Right Side of Body: Aaaaaaah this is awesome! It is like getting an oil change on my angel wing!

Left Side of Body: Shhh. I am making a list. And this massage person is too bony to do any good.

Stomach: (growl)

Right Side: OMG - she found the knot and the knot has relaxed!
Left Side: She can't handle these knots. If she finds them, I will light her bony fingertips on fire.
Right Side: Bony fingers are nice.
Left Side: Did you see what I did there? I fired all nerve endings into her hand and she backed off. NO ONE CAN HANDLE MY ROPES!

Right Side: AAAAAH! I am slipping off of the beg thingie. My wing is fanned out nicely.
Left Side: That is because you are the Right Side and you don't actually do anything.
Right Side: STFU! I carry the Sword and the Babies.
Left Side: Pssssht. I carry the Shield that Protects.

Stomach: May I have some soup?

Right Side and Left Side simultaneously: SHUT UP!

Left Side: God that Stomach is annoying. And BTW - I have fanned out nicely. So suck it.
Right Side: Really? Because your hand is clenched.

And then the massage was over.

Both sides of me (and my stomach) left. Back to the Real World. Bureaucracy, Illness, Stress, Obligation, Futility.

A Constant Dance of Balance.

Stomach had some Ramen Noodles.

Right Side put some sesame seeds on top.

Left Side tried to Dangle in hopes that it would look Relaxed.

Let Them Eat Cake

2011-12-16T00:12:00.001-06:00

These aren't cakes

They are Christmas Ornaments

In the form of French macaroons

In a package with a mini-boa

I had my monthly lunch with Cathy Rigby and My Wife and My Wife gave me these ornaments in effigy of this amazeballs Macaroon place that many of us hit up in Amboise. I faced a tough choice that afternoon and decided to go buy Rillettes du Canard - duck meat that has been chopped, salted and cooked slowly in fat until it is tender enough to be shredded and cooled with enough fat to form a paste.

By the time I caught up with the rest of the crew, they were licking their fingers clean with big beaming smiles on their faces. I waved my Duck Fat in a Can at their smug little faces but secretly I regret not trying those Macaroons. (BTW: My other regret that trip was not getting the tattoo I wanted outside of Pompidou.)

And I actually have a very short list of regrets in my life.

These 2 regrets represent 2 of 5.

In my life.

sigh

Lunch was good. We laughed. I love these ladies and am so glad that we get together once a month. Our trip to France with our kids will forever be ingrained in my heart.

During lunch, I got a text from My Favorite Sister that she wanted me to pick up a cake for Barf Vader's actual birthday today at some local blah-blah cake place. When I asked my friends if they knew where this was the both yammered on and on at once but one thing they both kept saying is "You know - near the bowling store."

This information is not helpful to me.

Found the cake store. (And guess what - there is a bowling store there. Who knew?) and got the cake.

Raced to rehearsal and worried about the cake melting in my car before realizing that it is freaking FREEZING here and my car is actually a refrigerator with wheels.

Raced on to My Mother's house and eventually My Favorite Sister came through the door with the Birthday Girl who is apparently.......sick.

They put the cake in front of her and she was......well at first she was nonplussed. Then she was just plain ol' pissed. And eventually she seemed to be wondering if *she* was the crazy one or if the people trying to get her to smash the cake for a photo op were the crazy ones.

Note the red hair

Note the "Are You Kidding Me" glare

Note her right hand

hee hee. That kid and I are from the same cloth.

We completed the Birthday Moment but Big Funny Kid and I had to scoot. We hadn't been home since 7:00 am and he has 3 tests tomorrow. And I have a date with my iPod. I GOTTA wrap my head around this musical.

Aaaaaand I have to worm my way into another school for my ELL fieldwork.

Oh yeah - and there is this whole Christmas thing going on.

sigh

S'ils n'ont plus de pain, qu'ils mangent de la brioche.

A Good Day

2011-12-14T23:34:00.001-06:00

Remember when I blogged a few days ago

about how hard I worked cleaning my kitchen?

Yeah - scratch that.

So My Favorite Sister had a doctor appointment and My Mother is still in a Medical Time Out (and boy is it irritating her) so I got some QT time with my nieces today.

Within moments, Cupcake wanted to "make a cake" which is to say that I give her a bunch of crap and she puts it in a bowl and stirs it and adds sprinkles. And I just let it all unfold. I don't even wince when the flour flies across the room. I don't interject and I don't tell her what to do.

Cuz I kinda just like watching kids do their kid stuff. Every moment does not have to be filled with yammering. It is actually quite fascinating.

Barf Vader has No Fear of Big Dogs

Big Dog has No Interest if food is not involved.

I didn't bust out any toys or turn on the TV. I just watched the girls explore the space. Cupcake was rather focused on cooking. Barf Vader REALLY wanted to walk. I helped her take laps around the house. She paused to have what appeared to be a very meaningful conversation with a piece of Tupperware.

Eventually I decided to introduce a new concept to her. I held her by her ankles so that her hands could touch the floor and she "walked" that way. And laughed. She loved it. (It is my secret hope that she takes her first steps upside down.)

When My Favorite Sister returned the three of us had settled in on the couch and were singing "Fa La La La La" very loudly. I can't remember what MFS said but I looked at Cupcake and said "What is mommy?" and she chirped: "Mommy is a Hot Mess."

MFS glared at me.

Then I showed her how Barf Vader learned how to shake her head "NO!" very emphatically and how adept she is at walking on her hands.

My work, for the moment, was done.

I raced to my Public Art Commission meeting. Traffic sucked. Made a note to talk to the Mayor about getting a siren for my truck for just such occasions. Seriously. Art Commissioners should have badges and sirens. Art is Important and occasionally URGENT.

Anyway - I got there just a few minutes late. We had a quorum.........Aaaaand - the Teen Voices project passed unanimously. I think I am going to become fast friends with Mr. Z. And our city is getting yet another great temporary installment.

More importantly - the teenaged students will get their Voices heard.

It was a Win. Win. Win. Win. kind of day.

A Giant Amongst Midgets

2011-12-14T00:44:00.001-06:00

He is the tallest kid in Pre-Kindergarden.

No - not the tall kid on the right.

The kid, Left of Center,

on his Knees holding the Book.

Big Funny Kid started his day reading to Cupcake's PK class. They are doing a Holiday Book thingie and naturally, BFK read "How the Grinch Stole Christmas".

BFK knows a thing or two about the Grinch

More importantly, he knows a thing or two about kids.

I love this about him.

BFK is very frank with me. And I am very frank with him. I KNOW that I occasionally annoy him and he KNOWS that he occasionally annoys me.

sigh

I had this whole blog planned out in my mind a few hours ago but we just spent the last couple of hours pouring over his PSAT/PLAN scores.

His efficacy is intact. He is pleased. He Facebooked about it. I like that he is getting a vision of his future and he is optimistic yet realistic.

sigh

Meanwhile, I am SUPER excited to give my big Art Commissioner vote for this project.

This particular educator went rogue and has raised private funds through kickstarter to make this project a reality for his students and their community.

I haven't met Mr. Z yet but I will tomorrow.

I am pretty certain that he is a Giant amongst Midgets.

I may have to give him a hug.

Pause

2011-12-13T00:20:00.000-06:00

I did it.

And I feel guilty.

But I got a "facial" today from Venus. And since it was her birthday I brought her a present. And since we are really good friends we started out yammering. But then the lights went low and she and I both realized that I needed a Peaceful Moment and she is a Professional.

I slipped into the warmed sheets on the yummy table/bed thingie.

She came in quietly and touched my face.

"Oh my gosh! Have you been sick?"

(Yeah - she is THAT good.)

So I had this facial......but every time I started to relax, I started making lists of things I had to do. Or I worried I had a booger in my nose. Or I realized that my hands were clenched.

And my mind wandered all over the place like a toddler lost at a Mall. I remembered clouds. I remembered divinity. I remembered when I used to teach Yoga and do Pilates and get acupuncture and pay attention to my General Well Being.

Then I remembered how fun it is to make Bacon with Big Funny Kid. How hilarious it is that D-Gang likes divinity and divinity is gross except for that one time that Dad snuck me in a piece at bedtime and said "Don't tell Your Mother." (The ONLY time he ever said that to me....and looking back I am fairly certain that she knew.)

My mind became a run-on sentence.

Venus applied many salves on my personage.

I dropped the Internal Guilt Trip and decided to Flow.

Unfortunately, that was about the time was over.

She left me alone and I hopped out of the warm bed thingie, revived and grateful that I didn't smell like Ranch Dressing.

I think I smelled like Hope.

Or Eucalyptus.

Or something.

I paid her for her services and ran out the door to accomplish this or that.

My Point?

We GOTTA take care of our crap, people. We GOTTA carve out some space. It doesn't have to involve money or other people or services.

But it MUST involve a Time Out.

A Meditation.

A Pause.

A Pause Without Internal Dialogue.

sigh

Trying...and Succeeding....Kinda

2011-12-12T01:21:00.003-06:00

My View

OK so I am OK. My Mother has described herself as "feeling perky" and Today is another day.

Got the stooooooopid tree up. Blech.

Got my final grade for my 518 class - Applications of Theories of Learning to Classroom Practice.

A!!!!!

So now I can use theories applicably while practicing classroomy stuff.

I kid. It was a VERY cool class. I rather hearted my Prof and my colleagues. I learned a TON. It was challenging and exciting and I hate to say it because it will sound like a conclusion, which it isn't, but there is a great deal of sociocultural psychology involved in learning.

Who knew?

Anyway - cleaned the kitchen to the bone. Started at the ceiling and worked my way down. Like corners and stuff. Like garbage cans pulled out and got on my hands and knees and took no prisoners and YUCK!

I hate yucky stuff.

Today was That Man I Love's birthday so I made him an awesome dinner (in my formerly clean kitchen).

Steak, Lobster, roasted garlic, fresh bread......good stuff.

Did 4 loads of laundry and sent an encouraging email to a friend.

Tried to figure out Who is Having Christmas Where and When and Where Do We Have to Be After That and What Do I Get His Mother and His Father and Who Is Into What and What Are Their Sizes.

UGH!

Then I stared into the Abyss.

sigh

24 Hours Is All You Get

2011-12-11T00:42:00.000-06:00

Time's up.

If this is a "24 Hour Flu" then the 24 hours are over

Hope my duodenum got the memo

Truth be told, I still feel like crap. Especially my joints and my organs and lymph nodes and such.

But I soldiered on. First stop was a haircut which I realize sounds very luxurious but I find it just to be another annoying piece of maintenance.

The chick who cuts my hair does a great job but she always styles it within 1 inch of a White Snake video.

And I am not even sure who Whitesnake is.

And because I have already lost 24 hours of my life, I was waaaaaay behind on stuff I needed to get done. My Original Plan was to not do retail stuff on a Saturday in December, but the Stomach Flu has forced my hand.

So off I went, into the Shopping World of the Unwashed Masses with my Whitesnake Hair and a very real possibility of projectile vomit. (or worse). I got dizzy. I glared a lot. I got a few things done and stumbled back to my car.

I think the fever was coming back so I sat in my car a little bit with the windows open. I think I may have fallen asleep (or passed out, most likely) but I woke up to the voice of a little girl who was singing "Santa Claus is Coming to Town"......and she got to the second verse and sang:

He's making a list

of Chicken and Rice

gonna find out who's naughty or nice.....

OK....that made me laugh.

And more importantly, chicken and rice sounded kind of good.

Not a fan of the season.

Not a fan of the stomach flu.

Tomorrow is another day.

(hee hee - can't wait to see what the hair looks like in the morning!)

UGH

2011-12-10T15:14:00.000-06:00

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 9

Remember in "Iron Man 2" when Whiplash shows up at Monte Carlo and beats Iron Man to within an inch of his life?

That is what is happening to me.

All my insides pieces are on the outside.

Chills, aches, messy messy things.

Big Funny Kid is at a speech meet. First one of the season for him and he placed 3rd! Very happy for him. Meanwhile I hope I live long enough to see his medal.

This sucks.

Hutch Is Crazy

2011-12-08T23:19:00.000-06:00

Go ahead.

Drink it in.

(and yes, this may represent why I avoid cholesterol tests)

So I haven't seen Hutch forever and when I saw her briefly earlier this week she said she was getting sick and turned her head and put her well manicured paw up in my general direction.

So she got sick.

And today I had one of those "I Said Yes When I Should Have Said No" meetings this morning....... and Hutch texted me on my way there and I don't know how it happened but somehow she said she was going to the grocery store so I started making a fictitious list for her because she kept goading me and I thought it was funny because I was tired and it was early in the morning and I like to screw around with her via texts so I kept adding things to the list and she kept asking for more items and I miss her and I wanted to park in her fancy parking space and she likes to tease me about being such a pushover when it comes to saying Yes When I Should Have Said No.

That run-on sentence was intentional.

That is mostly how Hutch and I communicate.

Yes.

I am studying for my Praxis I and Praxis II tests.

Soooooooo.......ANYWAY......I got back from the meeting that I Should Have Said No To and raced to my computer to stalk my final grades.

I am happy to report that after MUCH screen refreshing

I found a 100% and a 94% entered.

I sulked a bit about the 94%.

But I still have 2 more papers to get graded.

So let's not get excited.

ANYWAY - I grabbed my crap and went racing out the door for another meeting (Proposed Art Show! Sweet!!! I like Art Shows!!!!) and THAT is when I noticed a bunch of grocery bags outside my front door.

Seriously. It was hardly 9:30 AM.

That Crazy Assed Woman had brought me groceries. With bonus features like Ring Pops and a Festive Animal Print Santa Hat. And Ding-Dongs (I have never had one!)

sniffle

Aw, sucks.
She loves me.

And for SOME reason, the leopard print Santa hat may just push me towards some level of acceptance about this deal that we call the Holiday Season.

Then again, I may just hide in a corner, eating Spagehetti-O's and sucking on my Ring Pop until Spring comes.

It could go either way.

Off We Go (aka Magic)

2011-12-08T00:43:00.002-06:00

Another cast......coming together.

I'd like to think that D-Gang and I are a Well-Oiled Machine when it comes to productions. But we are wise enough to know that Each Production has its own dynamic.

I don't really care for Musicals.

But I care for Awesome School and Theatre and Students.

And D-Gang.

The first thing I usually do at this point in production is to focus on a few things.

Right now I am focused on a Kite and a Tango-ing Blanket.

Every production requires magic. I have a few experts that I might be able to pull into this process.

I heart magic.

“Those who shun the whimsy of things will experience rigor mortis before death.”
― Tom Robbins

PS. If you are SUPER bored you can watch this video. I think it is an example of "musical-ness". Plus I totally heart Olivia Newton John. And rollerskates.

I Want A Facelift

2011-12-07T00:23:00.001-06:00

Naaaah.

I really don't want a facelift any more that I want a breast reduction.

And I certainly don't want either of those things more than I want Peace on Earth.

And liposuction.

And Credit Repair.

And someone to clean my toilets.

sigh

I think I will settle for the JOY that my life gives me. Big Funny Kid is awesome. My Family is awesome.

It is the "Christmas season" and as such I will leave you with the sentiments of a mentor:

Mr. Martin

Enjoy the season.

Whee

2011-12-06T13:36:00.001-06:00

MONDAY, DECEMBER 5TH

So yeah - once a year most of us female types have to endure what we call in polite society "an annual". And the older we get, the more unpleasant elements get added to this procedure.

So today I had "my annual" and since this is a polite little blog I will spare the details and simply say that it is a very important and necessary medical check up and women should take them as seriously as they can, even though one of the aspects of this whole thing actually contains the word "smear".

Frankly, I was most concerned about the cholesterol test and as such I fasted after midnight. And my appointment wasn't until 1:45 the next day. And I was freaking STARVING. And that was my pervasive thought during an otherwise very invasive day.

And guess what????

NO CHOLESTEROL TEST!

YAY!!!!!

Now I have no idea why I wasn't tested and I certainly did not bring it up.

And I realize that with my age and particular epicurean tendencies (which range from 5 course gourmet meals to spaghetti-o's) that I should probably pay attention to such things.

Baby steps.

I got all the other parts checked out. I submitted to awkward and squishy stuff. I answered all sorts of questions (including if I wore a safety belt. REALLY????) and I just kind of wanted to get out of there and back to my life.

Which included a beeline to a grilled chicken burrito and a stop at the health food market for some Lady Vitamins.

You know.

Just in case.

Elise Navidad

2011-12-04T23:29:00.006-06:00

About a year ago.
I met this kid.

Her name is Elise, but I mostly call her Barf Vader.

She is about to turn 1 and today was her birthday party. Out in the Wilderness. With a snowflake theme.

My Favorite Sister has been working for months on this party and indeed it was lovely. She has an eye for detail and an ability to make sure that everyone had an activity.

B Vader's activity consisted of hanging out with me.

She had some jar food.

We made faces and noises.

She then wanted out of her high chair.

We accomplished that and went on to play "shove a diaper wipe in our mouth and play Mission Impossible". (One of our usual games.)

We did that for about an hour.

Then we put together a bottle and she had a nap.

Off in the distance, the people sang Happy Birthday to her......I would guess that a few of them didn't know who they were singing to. They just sang.

The snow was bright outside the window of the cabin where we sat. I watched Big Funny Kid slide down a snow covered hill with his arms out, flapping in the wind.

He looked like a deranged Yetti.

I am not a fan of winter or snow.

I don't know how to throw elaborate parties with this particular theme. But I have to give props to My Favorite Sister for creating such an event

....
...and for having the wisdom to let me chill

with her almost-one-year-old while she went about her party business.

A good time was had by all.

PS BFK and I may or may not have slipped our gift into the plethora of gift bags. This may or may not be it.

hee hee

Feeling.....Uh....Normal?

2011-12-04T16:05:00.001-06:00

WAIT!

Before I get to the "feeling normal" part- check out this picture.

It was taken in the dark with my phone.

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 3rd

I am sure this is a metaphor.

I slept for 6-ish whole hours in a BED. Like with boxsprings and everything. I showered. I stitched up my pants. I went to the grocery story. I got a coffee and groceries.

For a whole 2 hours I felt like what people call "normal".

I gave my final paper a final 30,000 once-overs. And then I released it to the world. Ok - not really the world. Just the Grading Fairies.

But the highlight of the day was going over to D-Gang's to work on the Charlie Brown script. And eating snacks and talking about teaching and family. Big Funny Kid came with and had fun with the teenaged people. They got in trouble for being too loud. D-Gang and I got in trouble for staying up too late.

Yep. Almost felt normal.

Cue The Fat Lady

2011-12-03T00:54:00.001-06:00

Saturday, December 2
(crap it is another one of those today blogs being written tomorrow.....)

I had my last Learning Theories class today and I am actually bummed that it is over. And the Grendel that is my GIGANTIC paper is about to be Beowulfed. It is gestating on my hard drive and hopefully marinating in its awesomeness.

Either that or I will open it tomorrow and decide it is crap.
Either way it is due by 5:00 tomorrow night.

Either way I will move some papers

and sleep here

again

I feel terrible that I didn't get to the hospital to see my mom. I heard from her and talked to Dad. She is improving but some other random crap is popping up. I know she thought she would be home by now.

On the bright side, I got to start my morning at a Cookie Exchange for The Girl Who Has My Heart.

I wasn't aware that it was so much more than the exchanging of cookies. It was the exchanging of Family Stories. Each student had made a book with stories about their families and the adults in the room would rotate from kid to kid. The kids would read what they had written. It was waaaaaaaaay charming. I love talking to kids. They are hilarious. I had one kid convinced that Tinkerbell was probably at his house. I wonder if he looked for her when he got home.

D-Gang said that when I left, her teacher commented to Child #3 that it was nice she had her mom AND her Special Friend come to the classroom. Child #3 corrected her and said that I wasn't her Special Friend, I was her Fairy Godmother. The teacher corrected her and said "You mean Godmother??" Child #3 said, "Nope. FAIRY Godmother."

Yo I Am A Time Traveler

2011-12-02T01:35:00.000-06:00

Monday, December 1st, 2011

So of course it is waaaaaay past my bedtime and as such this blog of today is being written while I am already in tomorrow.

My GIANT paper is peculating nicely but is now on hold until tomorrow - which is actually today.

Aaaaaaand, I the class for next semester that I wanted because of the time-slot in which it is offered actually started on Tuesday - while I am still in THIS semester. Being that I couldn't be in two places at once, I missed the first class for the next semester because I was in my last class for this semester.

But wait - it gets better.

I am watching a recorded session of the class I missed (while surrounded by research papers for the class that is officially over but whose GIANT paper isn't due until the day after tomorrow (tomorrow being today.)

The students in my new class are just starting their cohort and as such they are taking their FIRST semester of work but since I am part-time, I am joining them in this class even though it is my SECOND semester. So I am kind of going back in time.

While going forward.

And staying present. Somehow.

Does this give you a headache? I think it might be giving me a little one but it will all sort itself out soon enough.

PS - I hope that I don't have a deja vu while I am doing all this time traveling. That could be awkward.

Stretched

2011-12-01T01:02:00.000-06:00

Wow - come to think of it this was a really stupid toy in the 70's. Frankly most of the toys in the 70's sucked. Except for Rockem Sockem Robots.

I am gonna keep this one short and sweet because, as the picture implies, I am stretched a little thin right now.

So here are the basics:

My Mother is improving. She likes her doctor. He didn't come in while I was there so I left her some bullet points on the Whiteboard that I wanted answers to. The answers were mostly positive.

I tried to have lunch with My Favorite Sister and enjoy some niece time but I was kind of distracted.

I have a GIANT paper due Saturday. GIGANTIC. It is eating my brain.

Oh- but I got a paper back that I did in October for a different class and I got a 95% on it. So yay!

Today was the first day of auditions for D-Gang's latest theatrical project - "You're A Good Man Charlie Brown". LOTS of talented folks showed up. Unfortunately, the show doesn't have a huge cast so I am afraid tough decisions will have to be made and hearts will be broken. Big Funny Kid wants to stage manage which is a HUGE commitment.

I am registered for next semester but due to some miscommunication and scheduling issues, one of the classes I want from a time stand-point started yesterday. I got clearance to take it but now I am behind. Crap.

I have no groceries. No beverages. No cheese. Nada. That is probably how it is gonna have to be until the weekend.

OK....Gonna stretch myself out on this couch and try to take a snooze.

Tomorrow?

Rockem Sockem Robots!

Captive Audience

2011-11-29T23:58:00.003-06:00

I kinda like this part about My Mother being hospitalized. The part where I get to take care of HER. The part where she is tethered to a machine and is forced to listen to me. The part where Dad shows up and we sync our schedules.

OMG

I am going to hell.

I just gave reasons about why My Mother's illness is working out for me.

I am a Bad Daughter.

sigh

What I really meant to say is that we are pulling together. In fact at one point (while Dad and I were exchanging schedules) My Mother said "For God's Sake stop figuring out who is going to show up next. I am not that exciting."

And Dad said, "If you weren't in the hospital, we would just be standing around in your kitchen, talking."

I wanted to say "Yeah - but the food is better in the hospital."

But I didn't.

hee hee......Maybe I am a Good Daughter after all.

Machines....Gotta Love Them

2011-11-28T22:44:00.001-06:00

When the machines go off in My Mother's hospital room, then it means something is amiss. Frankly machines are going off all around us. Down the hall, around the corner.

Machines are useful.

I spent most of the day with her, then off to school, then home, then dinner, then laundry/dishwasher.

Machines transport us, cook our food and clean our clothes.

I settled down to catch up on a ton of reading for class tomorrow. My books are all downloaded. And when I nod off, my fingertips hit the touchpad and the entire document turns blue. When I snap out of it, I see my document is blue and I realize I have to scroll back up and re-assert myself.

Machines remind us of what we were doing.

My Mother is doing well.

No more worries from the Blogosphere.

The body is a Machine.
Sometimes it needs repair.

Well Crap.

2011-11-27T22:41:00.000-06:00

That's Big Funny Kid

Showing My Mother how to play a movie on her iPad

Cuz she is in the hospital.

Crap.

My Favorite Sister called this morning, "Mom's in the hospital. Pneumonia."

I made the kids breakfast and went to investigate this situation. I got there while her doctor was there - one of those rare moments in a hospital setting. So I got the scoop from him. I saw pictures of her lungs. Yuck.

Dad returned a few minutes later and he filled me in a little about what had happened. He had been worried about her most of the night. He said he woke up in the middle of the night and watched her breathing. That is when he decided this had gone on long enough. He methodically packed a bag for her and took her in.

I can only assume that she didn't go willingly.

The first hospital - the closest one - got things rolling but decided she should go to the bigger hospital. And she got her very first ambulance ride.

I asked her if they turned the sirens on. She said no but then proceeded to tell me all about her ambulance driver and the EMT. The EMT was from Hawaii - large family. She went on and on about every detail of this man's life.

Yep. That's My Mother. She pays very little attention about what is happening to herself but instead wants to connect with everyone else around her. I am sure there is some psychological aberration that can explain this behavior but it mostly sets the stage for how the rest of the day was gonna go.

I went back tonight to check on her. I heard all about her nurse's engagement to some guy in Alabama.

My Mother doesn't do "Take Care of Me" any better than she does "Take Care of Myself". She flourishes with "Take Care of Other People".

sigh

I dunno. I get fairly efficient with this whole hospital business. It just isn't a place for hand wringing. And it is a pretty dumb time to sit around making jokes and small talk. I figure if you aren't the one in the gown with your butt hanging out then you are there to make that person comfortable. But when I got My Mother to that state this morning, she wouldn't fall asleep. She told me "Oh - I don't want to sleep if you are here."

I almost put a kink in her oxygen tube.

Tonight I tried a different tactic. I handed her a brush and told her she looked like the Crypt Keeper. My Favorite Sister laughed. I turned to her and said "Keep yucking it up - less than a year ago you weren't looking too hot in the hospital either."

My Favorite Sister jokingly said to me "Why are you the one person in the family that doesn't have funky illnesses?"

I told her "Because someone has to be well to take care of all ya'll's sorry asses. Now help me change her gown."

We all laughed and got her slightly gussied up. Big Funny Kid and Dad came in a little while later. Big Funny Kid is a worrier. I know it was important for him to see that she wasn't incapacitated. And it was important for her to see him see that she was gonna be OK.

And she will be OK - at her level of OK-ness. She is in the right place and got there at the right time.

Tomorrow is another day. And tonight I am gonna snuggle with BFK and watch some zombies. I hope My Mother is sleeping.

Mission Accomplished.....I Think

2011-11-27T01:31:00.000-06:00

Today I Used My Noodle....

A LOT!

So I literally made a ton of fresh pasta....some of which for a chicken noodle soup extravaganza......some of which was for a pasta dinner.

Both were executed.

But I also had to execute my final project for my 518 class. Which was a lesson redesign. Long story short, it included culinary skills and tomatoes.

So I have been using my Noodle all week to design this plan. I have to encompass everything I learned in this class all semester.

If you have a kid or a grand kid or were a kid in recent years,

the Noodle Dance may come to mind.

If you are lucky enough to escape this crap, count yourself blessed.

So I made pancakes.

Then my lesson framework.

Then noodles.

Then chicken noodle soup.

Then executed my redesign video.

Then edited.

Then made a delicious dinner.

Then edited and re-shot.

Then sat down.

And wrote some more.

And I awaited the USC/UCLA game which was on a time delay. Grrrrrrrrr.......

(FINALLY!) and at halftime, Murrbeth (Child #1) insisted that I sing a tune or two downstairs on their RockBand binge. I graciously indulged. A little Gaga and a little Night Ranger.

Kids ran all over the house. Brownies were made. Bands were formed.

And USC kicked UCLA all the way back to Westwood.

50-0

It is late. I think today's mission was accomplished.

Break On Through

2011-11-26T00:37:00.002-06:00

So we have all been RIVETED to my blog, right? And when last we left off I was doing dishes last night.

I failed to mention that I ended up singing

Every Cool Song Known to Mankind on RockBand.

Which explains why I woke up with a sore throat. At first I thought I was sick but then I realized that I am just a crappy singer.

Self-Evaluation and Reflection.

One of the MANY services I offer.

Anyway, today I promised My Mother that I would bring back some dishes, and help her out with my nieces. I did.

I promised Big Funny Kid that I would get him to his Afternoon Plans. I did.

And I would make a Fine Dinner.
I did.

(Fondue night. Cheese, Meat and Chocolate.)

And I promised that he could have his Pal over.

And I furthermore offered that the Pal could spend the night.

I like Pal.

He and I talked about writing extensively. And he insisted that I sing Sister Christian on RockBand. But I switched it up by singing Pearl Jam. (99% on Expert mode)

He was very worried about overstaying his welcome. So I made him a bed in the basement and brought him a snack.

Pssssht......

Chez Loco is ALWAYS a place for Friends. There will be food. There will be laughter. I may or may not end up singing.

I kinda like these Teen-Aged years.

Food, Family and Flood

2011-11-25T21:42:00.001-06:00

Thursday, November 24th

T-Day finally arrived. I woke up earlier than usual and actually waited for the Macy's Day Parade to start. I was just starting to feel sorry for myself that I would be watching it alone when I got a text from Hutch. She was watching it too! So I made a quick bagel and settled in to enjoy the show with her. We were both anxiously awaiting the performance by Neil Diamond.

Woo Hoo!

I went over to My Mother's a little early because I figured she would be well on her way to losing her mind. Surprisingly she had things fairly under control. I just needed to keep her on task.

The rest of the Looney Tunes were late but when they arrived in mass, the craziness ensued. Everyone has a "job". Mine was to make Brussels Sprouts, my cousin makes the potatoes (and attempted to teach Little Miss how to do this.) And my aunt - whose culinary skills are well documented - offered up her raspberry jello. It turned out like this:

It typically turns out like that.

And we typically make the same "I'll get the straws" jokes.

My Aunt has a lot of talents. Although cooking is not one of them, she is a great partner in crime when it comes to coveting the stuffing that came out of the bird. We worked in tandem to make sure the "good stuff" never left our table. (oh - and the bad stuff - the stuff NOT in the bird - ended up on the floor after My Mother dropped the entire dish of it onto her foot. I scooped it back into the pan and set it on the "kids table".)

Speaking of the Kid's Table - Big Funny Kid made the move to the Big People Table. I didn't sit next to him due to the prior positioning of My Aunt and the Proximity of the Good Stuffing. But I think he had some good conversations.

My Cousin has a daughter around Cupcake's age and they were super besties. My Cousin and I used to perform a Thanksgiving Day sketch when we were younger. I always made her be the Native American by convincing her that her costume was cooler. The truth behind my casting was actually to prevent her from having any lines. I am thinking of resurrecting this tradition next year with this new generation.

All was going well until.......water came pouring out of the dishwasher. And all over the floor. And apparently down the wall/ceiling of the room underneath it. I taught Dad the joys of a wet/dry vac. We got the water out of the bottom of the dishwasher while a brigade of other family members rescued the box of pictures that got an unexpected shower.

Alls well that ends well. I took a ton of dishes home to wash (and TOTALLY nabbed a baggie of "the good stuffing" - my Aunt did too!)

Thanksgiving - traditions, chaos, laughter, working together and enjoying the Good Stuff.

Family.

Thanksgiving Preview

2011-11-24T00:58:00.001-06:00

If yesterday was a Thanksgiving Dress Rehearsal, then tonight was a Thanksgiving Preview.

The People That I Come From get together the night before Thanksgiving with the ultimate goal of making stuffing (some call it dressing) by hand. We eat pizza and drink beer and chase children and hug and catch up and laugh.

And commiserate.

And laugh.

We fling breadcrumbs and butter in the air while gesturing with our hands.

We seamlessly trade roles, mind each other's wine glasses and try to assess if we have the right amount of seasoning.

(PS - the answer is ALWAYS more onion,

more sage,

more salt,

more broth,

more pepper.)

More butter.

Lately (gratefully) a small child will come running through the room causing turmoil. Cuz it is the little ones who will eventually be the ones that grow up and end up flinging breadcrumbs in the air. Long after the rest of us are gone.

BTW: Guess who only broke ONE glass tonight??

Woo Hoo!

I am still cooking.

I am in charge of Brussels Sprouts and cinnamon apples. I got the sprouts. Gonna finish them with bacon and cream and shallots. DUH!

But the apples are kind of an Old Ye Ancestor Tradition.

sigh.

I don't want to do my Ancestors wrong.

sigh

I will end with a shout out to Hutch for reminding me that Lady Gaga was on VH-1. That totally helped me with my Cinnamon Apple Paralysis.

OK.

So here is my Thanksgiving Wish. Think of it as a Prayer if you are feeling formal.

Please, please, please......Feast on Your Moment.

Gnaw on The People who make your Life more Interesting.....

Throw some Gravy on a Rough Spot and watch it Soften.

Pass the rolls. Eat some pie.

Give Thanks.

Cuz where there is Thankfulness, there is Hope.

Where there is Hope, there is Family.

Where there is Family, there is Chaos.

And where there is Chaos, there is laughter.